Without a modern stadium, equipped for the demands of the NFL, Los Angelinos hopes for an NFL team have been suppressed for years. Sure USC has provided some pro-level thrills here and there (thanks Reggie Bush!), but nothing has come close to that NFL feel. And frankly, nothing will. So why not get behind something entirely different and more than a little crazy? Something like Gene Simmons and Paul Stanley, of the rock band KISS, creating an Arena Football expansion team and named it after their band? Too crazy? Well, that shit ACTUALLY HAPPENED.
Football is back. Enter the LA KISS.
Think of the most generic football player you can. The most cliche composite of every standard jock stereotype there is. You probably see a giant hulk of a man with taped fingers, black out smudged under his eyes, and tribal tattoos peeking out from under his jersey. He’s shouting about something. Probably hustle or “gettin’ his”. If you had to sum the guy up in three words you could use loud, huge, and sweaty. A grizzly bear of a gladiator, thirsty to get out on the field and mess someone up. Also, he is an alcoholic womanizer who acts like he is above the law and starts fights in night clubs with people who don’t respect him. Oh was that not part of your mental picture? Well that has been the cliche football player we have all become accustomed to over the last several decades: a slightly more athletic Rob Ford.
Seriously it’s like someone let a lineman from Miami run a city.
Every four years the world bears witness to an athletic event that is synonymous with excellence. The unrivaled showcase of the greatest competitors the human race has to offer. With every event, spectators from around the world hold their breath as the men and women wearing the colors of their homeland chase the promise of eternal glory. Then two years later the Winter Olympics happen and everyone is semi-interested but mostly confused.
“Wait is this a sport or are they just filming them
skiing to the event?”
Wow guys. Remember way back in the day when I predicted that this Super Bowl was going to be considered the greatest of all time and that the Broncos would win a hard fought battle and solidify their legacy as the greatest offense of all time? Man things were crazy two days ago. I honestly was not planning on writing a follow up to that article because who would honestly care? But I made a lot of predictions that not only did not happen, but were the exact opposite of what actually happened.
I call this picture “Right After the 2nd Half Kickoff”
Just in case you have been in a coma for the last couple weeks and weren’t aware, we are on the cusp of the most American holiday there is: Super Bowl Sunday. A day where we embrace overindulgence of alcohol, terrible food, and celebrate the true American pastime of football. So it’s like every other day in America except we get excited for commercials. I don’t know about you, but I am extremely excited for the game this year. Primarily because I am a longtime Denver Broncos fan. Basically since I was old enough to process that Denver’s logo is a pissed off horse with a fire mane.
The old logo shot laser beams! We should all be Broncos fans.